You can’t even make this stuff up anymore.

An 11-year-old Broward County, Florida honor roll student (she attends Silver Trail Middle School in Pembroke Pines) was suspended from school for cutting a peach. I am not making this up.

According to the girl’s parents, Ronald and Andrea Souto, the child cut a peach with butter knife so she could share it with her friend. Oh.  And the knife was actually designed for children. It had a plastic handle with cartoon figures on it.

“This is a set of a spoon, fork and knife for toddlers — one year old,” Andrea Souto said. “It is made for children to learn how to eat properly. She’s used it since she was baby.”

However, the school has a “no tolerance” weapon policy, which she apparently violated when she cut the peach.

“The friend asked for half of the peach and she cuts half of the peach and gives to her friend. She goes to the bathroom and comes back and the guy said, ‘Follow me,’” Ronald Souto said.

As a result, she was suspended for six days. SIX DAYS. …read more here