COVID-19 Calamitous Forecasts of Doom Proven Wrong 5 Weeks After Pioneer Day Celebration 

News, Commentary, & Satire by Ed Wallace / Publisher at / Aug 31, 2020

It’s been 5 weeks since the controversial Pioneer Day Celebration was held on July 24th. The event was attended by thousands of freedom-loving citizens and was hosted on private property, the Staheli Family Farm in Washington City, and was produced by “Utah Business Revival”, headed up by Washington City resident Eric Moutsos.  

Other than the “Black Lives Matter” and “Cancel Dixie” protests, it was the first large social gathering in the area since the beginning of the COVID-19 “China Virus” Corona pandemic. The government was NOT INVOLVED in any way and the event probably went against the guidelines for large gatherings. It was produced without one penny of taxpayers money and there was no admission.  

There were thousands of liberty-loving patriots walking around, enjoying life and each other, celebrating their heritage and freedom, basically being normal, all while mostly ignoring the masks and social distancing guidelines put in place by our ever-knowing and ever-expanding government whose only purpose in being is to protect and watch over us.

Related Article: Massive Heritage & Freedom Celebration at Staheli Family Farm Mostly Ignored By Local Media.

The event drew heavy criticism and dire predictions of a rise in COVID-19 infections and fatalities. These include: “You’re all going to die”, You’re going to destroy this beautiful city”, “Wearing a mask is not a political statement. It means you care about other people’s health and safety. “Don’t be so selfish… Don’t you care about others?, “You should be fired and arrested”, “They think rules and common sense don’t apply to them.”, “Hospitals will be overrun and desperate patients could die without ventilators.”,  “OMG,, we’re all going to die.” Yes, the mortality rate of the human race is 100%. It is due to the inferiority of carbon based units.

One studied local resident predicted “So we shall see a spike in covid in about 2 weeks. Don’t group together. Social distance and wear masks and we will be able to get back to normal sooner. I am watching the numbers. How do you not understand basic science?”

I’ve been watching the numbers too and they tell a very different story. There has been no spike in new infections and deaths. Actually, the opposite has happened. The following graphs tell the real story:

I don’t like playing the victim but there’s no doubt about the personal and societal effect of C19. I’ve noticed the prohibition of “touch” is desensitizing us, alienating us, and leading people to not trust each other because everyone is a potential enemy.  These past few months have taken over our liberties and even our dreams and desires. Forces are using compassion and shame as a way of mass degradation and submission that furthers their control and suppresses dissent, especially with the coercion of masks and the enforcement of trivial demands like walk this way, go out that door, only one roll of TP, etc. They are trying to break our will and universally dominate information.

As we all know, viruses can be very dangerous, and we need to take all precautions otherwise we can be infected by them! As the coronavirus continues to spread, face masks have been in high demand, but experts warn that wearing a mask is not the best way to prevent the virus — instead, they advise washing your hands, stop touching your face, and avoiding sick people. Genius advice.

The Future is Now

Dr. Anthony Fauci, the Corona Geru, recently suggested that Americans should consider wearing goggles or a face shield in order to prevent spreading or catching COVID-19. When asked if we’re going to get to a point where eye protection is recommended, the director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases responded, “It might, if you really want perfect protection of the mucosal surfaces.”

“You have mucosa in the nose, mucosa in the mouth, but you also have mucosa in the eye,” he continued. “Theoretically, you should protect all the mucosal surfaces. So if you have goggles or an eye shield you should use it.” Dr. Fauci is the highest paid federal employee at $417,608. He makes more than the President.  

This whole pandemic thing has morphed into an unprecedented level of societal and governmental absurdity. Let’s face it….. Sanity has left the earth and we are now the victims of a mandated mass psychosis event with dueling realities. It has become impossible for many to nail down what reality really is. But thankfully, we have mainstream media and government officials determining for us what we should think. Nobody can better plan, monitor, supervise, and assess my quality of life. We should all be grateful that the burden of worrying and thinking has been lifted from us.

So, “Are You Enjoying Your ‘Test Drive’ of Socialist America?”

In 5 months, one cup of Chinese bat soup has accomplished more than the 41 year cold war with Russia. America is now well on its way to becoming a gigantic police state.

The current economic catastrophe in America today is a sneak preview of what life will look like in the future. The goal is to kill your job, close your business, and turn our country into a Venezuela or Cuba.

Just imagine….. money will magically appear in your account, you won’t have to work, and you can spend your days watching talk shows or Netflix movies. And, after all those “non-essential” businesses have been closed, you’ll have more time to visit with your neighbors while you wait in line to see if there’s anything available to buy at the “approved” commercial establishments. That might prove difficult while wearing voice-muffling masks and standing six feet away from each other. (In case you haven’t been to Wal-Mart lately, too many people don’t even bother to wear pants anymore.)

Cuomo gives illegals drivers license. Every one registered gets a mail in  ballot. - The Donald - America First

Here in Utah, our government has deemed it necessary to require mail-in ballots for future elections in order to “protect” us. But, in Wisconsin, experts were shocked when there was not a spike in coronavirus-related deaths after 1.55 million people voted in April’s primary, including more than 400,000 people who voted in-person. The authors of the study stated: “In the worst case, in which all 71 cases were attributable to voting, we would expect 0.71 deaths out of 413,220 people, which is the fatality risk of driving an automobile approximately 140 miles. It appears the voting in Wisconsin on April 7 was a low-risk activity”  

Which might lead some to wonder what else the infectious disease modeling experts will be surprised by when the economy reopens across most of the country.

Mail In Ballots: Remember To Vote Early and Vote Often! - Imgflip

Democratic strategist James Carville actually said that “Republicans will literally kill people to stay in power,” and he wasn’t alone. The internet was virtually flooded with think pieces from liberals warning how dangerous it was to hold the primary and confidently predicting that Republicans would be held accountable for killing people by requiring them to show up and vote  

Obama even got into the act and  tweeted, “No one should be forced to choose between their right to vote and their right to stay healthy like the debacle in Wisconsin this week.” 

The idiocy continues: 

In the Czech Republic,  police ordered nude sunbathing gals at the Lázně Bohdaneč nude-beach resort in the Pardubice region to wear masks to protect themselves from the CCP-Wuhan-Corona-Virus following complaints of nudists without face masks. See link here or here. An official said, “We understand that many people do not have a garden and want to “ventilate” into the countryside, but we all want one thing in common: to fully respect government regulations, so that the measures taken can be gradually relaxed. However, we will not achieve this before everyone has strictly followed the restrictive measures.”

In Wisconsin, the innovative “Party That Cares” government is all in for mask theater to the extent that one agency demands their employees wear masks during Zoom conferences. DNR spokeswoman Megan Sheridan spoke with McClatchy News and said that employees wearing masks while video conferencing with external partners sets a good example during the pandemic.“ By wearing a mask while video conferencing with the general public, we visually remind folks that masking is an important part of navigating the business of natural resources during this tumultuous time,” Sheridan said.”

Crazy Minneapolis Mayor Jacob Frey (D) requested that “protesters” in the City of Lakes practice social distancing and wear masks to reduce coronavirus transmission. The municipal government claimed to provide hundreds of masks to the public for this purpose. Police were called off riot duty to arrest a woman not wearing a mask in the park. Commies, put your full head coverings on and go play in the freeway of life. Please. 

Now, this is Dr. Francis Sellers Collins, the Director of the National Institute of Health. Do you see anything wrong with this picture? We’ll wait…………need more time?……..Got it? Lest you forget, he’s the Director of the NIH and has no clue how to wear a face mask. And we wonder why the term ‘expert’ has become utterly meaningless? Did I mention he’s the NIH director?

And, in an interview with TMZ, Rep. Maxine Waters (D-CA) demonstrated how to prevent catching a computer virus while having an interview using a webcam.
Maxine Waters.jpg

Always use a surgical mask when using a computer, whether it is in the office, or at home, even if there is no one else around!

I hope she’s wearing rubber gloves, there’s no telling what disease the person at the keyboard on the other end of that conversation is spreading. And to prevent nostril tunnel syndrome, be sure the nostrils rest easily above the top of the mask, as Maxine has done.

Maxine is not the only one concerned, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is also actively using the latest in anti-viral technology.

And they say American Exceptionalism is dead!

As people rush to buy face masks amid the coronavirus outbreak, a new web browser extension is offering a satirical “safer browsing experience”: it places face masks on every face it identifies. The tool, which was created by web developer Moritz Klack, spots faces and places a white mask over their nose and mouth. Here it is in action:

A Russian’s advice on creating a perfect face mask in 6 seconds. Understanding Russian is not required, just watch.

A grapefruit a day keeps the coronavirus away! Desperate Chinese resort to using FRUIT and BRAS as face masks… while pranksters mock the crisis with other hilarious alternatives


A family using plastic bags at the airport


Kids are less at risk, a simple Head Pod Light will suffice:


This is the Captain Kirk full body Coronavirus suit. It becomes invisible so the viruses can’t find him.


Now as a public service…
The face mask of tomorrow, today! Buy now!

Lose all individuality! Protect yourself with the new NPC full-head mask, now featured in the dry goods store – even protects your eyes and ears.

mask of the hive mind.jpg

There are dangers everywhere. The very air we breathe is filled with a miasma of toxic poison. Inside, outside, up, down and all around, you need protection. Throw away all other masks. They are garbage. No other mask gives you the full protection of the hive-mind living you so desperately need in these perilous times.

The new and improved NPC full head covering from The People’s Cube – sold by exclusive exclusivity only at our dry goods store – has all the safety features every modern hive-mind mentality needs to remain safe from the toxic miasma of individualism and life outside the basement. It is chockablock with identity virus protection.

Covers the mouth, the nose, and now the eyes and ears too! You will lose all personal identity and responsibility associated with it, in hive-mind comfort and darkness.

The People’s Cube assumes no responsibility for falls, trips, getting run over, getting sucker punched, being led to the edge of a cliff, being called funny names, children playing practical jokes at your expense, getting robbed, maimed, kicked, or spat on, or any other mishap that may befall the user.

The author, wearing a customized limited edition.

Ordinary face masks made by corporationy corporations simply don’t cover enough face to lose your personal identity nearly enough to keep you safe.

Will this be available in burka size? Asking for a female relative.

I cannot help wondering what covering will be required next. Some have already begun wearing gloves although such are not yet mandated. So the next mandate must be something altogether new and unexpected. I’m going to suggest hair coverings. After all, cooties viruses cling to hair and are scattered into the air when a person moves xyzlbtqer head. So hair must be confined.   

Just think of the disaster the world would be in if everything were not controlled. I’ve learned that considering facts, science, economic history, political history or simple math will only lead me astray. If we already have a demented world, and we like it —will they let us keep our demented world??

I miss the 70’s so much—the reckless abandon alongside a basic civility… pure fun and imagination. Today everything is narcissism, ’empowerment’, fighting, fear and hatred

If Hillary were president the coronavirus would be too afraid to come to the United States!

It’s never too late to vote Hillary!