Wednesday, June 20, 2018
The 5000 Fingers of President T
|“And be careful with those Little Hands hats!”|
Sea levels are rising dramatically owing to the outpouring of Liberal tears over the evil President T’s continuing abduction of immigrant children as they cross America’s southern border.
Once separated from their families, the weeping waifs are forced to pound out patriotic songs on the White House “500 Kid Piano” – every key of which was made with endangered elephant ivory – while President T waves his baton and screams that the children have to play “bigly” if they hope to ever see their parents again.
Okay, that’s not really what Trump is doing, although it’s as true as what you’re likely to hear from the mainstream media these days. What we were describing was Dr. Seuss’s fever dream of a kid’s movie, “The 5000 Fingers of Dr. T,” about which there are two cinematic schools of thought: those who think it’s one of the greatest films ever, and those who wouldn’t know a great film if it bit them in their piano bench region.
But returning (reluctantly) to reality, Leftists and other soft-headed types are having absolute conniption fits over President Trump’s brand new policy of temporarily separating kids from their families when they enter the country illegally. And when we say “brand new policy,” we mean exactly the same policy which has been law since champion-of-the-children Bill “Pedophile Island” Clinton was president. Certainly Barack Obama made major use of the policy, albeit without a peep of complaint from the mainstream media.
The separations occur only after illegal border crossings (ie, not when people come to an actual American port of entry and make a simple asylum claim) and are done in part to give social services time to ascertain whether the kids are actually traveling with a parent, or simply being dragged over the border by an MS-13 gang member who transports minors for sex trafficking.
Despite what cynical liars like Hillary Clinton say in their self-serving fundraising letters, the kids are not kept in cages, ripped from the arms of breastfeeding mothers, or mistreated in any way. And come to think of it, wasn’t it Hillary F. Clinton who claimed “it takes a village” (i.e. the government) to raise kids rather than actual parents?!
The “news” media and equally laughable social media are treating this as an ongoing repeat of the Holocaust (no, really – they’ve played that card) rather than the continuing implementation of decades’ old policy. And among their favorite tools are memes showing pitiful children in cages, like this one:
We don’t really want to add to the flood of fake news, but if the Left wants to make false claims about this picture, why shouldn’t we make even better false claims…?
|Seriously, wouldn’t it be fun to see this go viral?|
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