Seriously, you’re going to put your vision into the hands of America’s sworn enemies and the Dollar Store?!

And since Nazis are very popular in the news right now…

Okay, one more, just for fun…

Today is “eclipse” day, which we’re having sort of a hard time getting excited about. Not that we don’t like looking at shadows, but come on – what’s the big deal? At least one “news” outlet we saw referred to the eclipse as “historic,” and many sources are calling it a “once in a lifetime event” despite the fact that the next total eclipse in these parts is just 7 years from now. Which, granted, may seem like a lifetime to Trump haters.

As far as we’re concerned, the moon’s shadow is always somewhere but we just don’t see it, in much the same way we don’t see a random Chinaman taking his morning poo on the far side of the world. Both are hard-to-see sights unless you’re in exactly the right place at just the right time. Even so, we wouldn’t go out of our way to catch either one (nor would we observe either without protective eyewear).

Then again, maybe we’re just grumpy because this is the week that our personal “Apocalypse glasses” need to be put on during the home remodeling. The master bathroom has come a long way (on Friday, workmen finished tiling the floor of our master closet and the result is breathtaking – in part because it was supposed to be carpeted) and today our giant, expensive granite countertops are arriving – producing a near total eclipse of our wallet.

Alas, Formica, I knew you well…

Putting in the kitchen countertops means tearing out our stove, our sink, disposal, and our dishwasher – none of which will be replaced for days at the very least. Seriously, we’re going to be living like North Koreans. Well, North Koreans with access to fast food.

On the positive side, the coffee machine will now be perking in our only working bathroom, which should prove to be a time-saver (assuming that, in an historic first, the aforementioned Chinaman hasn’t beaten us in there).